Dainty Sichuan Food. 03 96638861.

26 Corrs Lane, Melbourne 3000.

Table sharing, anyone?

Dessert House Eatery. 03 96631400.
Shop 18, Mid City Arcade. 200 Bourke Street. Melbourne.
Engrish: 8. BON: 5
TTDWW: Silently make fun of the international students around you.

Dessert House sells dessert, obviously.
Yet Ramen hasn't seen anyone ordering their crepes. Most customers (mainly international students) go there for their HK style dishes.
Translated as 'Cart Noodles', you can choose from the 30+ items on the menu to go with different noodles or different sauces.
Aside from that, you've got your normal Ala Carte menu, starting at $8. Your drinks get cheaper with any meals ordered.
The signature dish of Dessert House for Ramen is their lemon grass pork/chicken chop with egg on rice/noodles.
Another great dish would be the spicy pepper chicken chop with rice. Basically it's just fried chicken on rice, but be sure to have your neighbours glaring at you with envy if you happen to place an order.
Did Ramen mention the tiny space of Dessert House? Also, expect to wait in line during peak hours, which is pretty much all the time.
Dessert House has opened a branch along Swanston Street recently. They've taken the 'Cart Noodles' off the menu but has included a new range of baked rice/ pasta. Ramen's just too attached to the lemon grass.

Side dish gala

Han Guuk Guan. 03 96391747
13A Victoria Street. Melbourne.
Engrish: 10. BON: 0 (All men)
TTDWW: Figure out what's in the side dish.

Well hidden at the corner of Victoria and Exhibition Street, Han Guuk Guan is a very surprising restaurant. It pops out of nowhere. At least that was Ramen's first impression when his friend brought him there.
Immediately he felt a sense of authenticity because of the wooden interior, and the alienation of the restaurant itself.
And the supporting reason, will be the Korean menu filled with unconvincing English translation, which excited him even more.
The first time Ramen was there, he couldn't find the Bibimbap. So he ordered some random dish which turned out to be fried rice with omelet.
However, do try the Kim Chi stir fry dumplings with rice sticks. Actually, just try the dumplings. A quick dish would be the Jajyungmen, which is sort of similar to dry noodles with black bean sauce. Supposedly everyone in Korean dramas eats that. You can also order a 'Ying Yang' noodle dish, which you get half Jaijyungmen and half seafood spicy soup noodles.
Last weekend, Ramen's finally managed to spot the Bibimbap under the 'Korean food' section. (The menu has 2 sections: Chinese and Korean)
For $11, it's too healthy. You can pay an extra $2 for the stone bowl so that it's warmer than the metal bowl Ramen had.
He liked it, but not sure if it's worth paying that much money for mixed beef, veges and egg with rice. Then again, Korean food's always steep to start with. Ramen'd return to try the other dishes in the future. Especially the BBQ and hot pot. First he has to make some friends to cover the bill.


2 teaspoons of white sugar, 1 teabag, 50 or 100ml of milk, depending on Ramli's mood. Will his lifespan be shorten if he drinks 3 cups a day? Ramli wonders.

Sydney Blues

Bambini Trust Café. +61 2 9283 7098.
185 Elizabeth St, Sydney, Australia.
Engrish: 0. BON: 7.
TTDWW: Admire other people's dishes.

The first time Ramli was there, he didn't dare to walk with his university hoodie.

It seemed very classy.

It was recommended by a friend for its coffee, being ranked as one of the tops along with Campos. How could Ramli not give it a try?

It is a very nice and classy place for suited up working people to have lunch. Ramli and his friend were denied to have coffee indoor because they were serving lunch, so they had to take away. It cost $2.50 for a long black, much cheaper than the average.

First sip had Ramli disappointed, because he prefers strong coffee. It tasted as if it was diluted. However, as Ramli drank on, the coffee's aroma grew smoother and creamier. It was actually a very good cup of coffee! It's different from Campos: it won't hit you on the first sip as Campos has a much stronger characteristic. It's like... comparing marinara and carbonara. They are both pastas but they have different sauces hence totally different breed. It's probably because of the coffee beans they use - Cremcaffe.

What's more to life, than to have a long black from Bambini in a cold rain?

Pray you never burp

King of Kings. 03 96632895.
209 Russell Street. Melbourne.
Engrish: 7. BON: 3.
TTDWW: Ask your friend to describe her trip to Bangkok.

The dish you see above, is called egg chiffon on rice.
Ramen has never seen it before upon arriving Melbourne. In fact, King of Kings is possibly Ramen's first Chinese restaurant.
Obviously the egg chiffon is a must try. The word chiffon, Ramen suspects, comes from 'Chiffon cake', referring to the almost cake-like texture of the omelet. You can choose any meat to go with the egg chiffon, be it bbq pork, beef, roast chicken, roast duck etc. A normal egg chiffon dish comes with duck sauce. The specialty of King of Kings, is the chili oil flakes seen above.
When all is mixed up, you get a unique dish only offered in this tiny easy to neglect restaurant. Warning: You might lose 2 years of your life span as it is, you can probably guess, mighty unhealthy.

Say Cheese

Ok, so Ramen saw the ads and got conned into buying it.
Kraft's easy mac snack is like the western version of Mi Goreng. At 99c per pack, it's 3 times the price of its Indonesian rival.
Nutritional value: 0.2%
Obviously as a Kraft product, be sure to taste the cheese.
And maybe feel your life stream slipping away.
One of those snacks that leaves you feeling dirty upon finishing it.